Purely - Strictly

Why being out of school rules

I completed my 2 reading blogs! -

Popular Materials

Young Adult Materials

I am definitely more proud of my YA one. One day I will try to consolidate them all..

But now -








....to be continued.

Why Library School Slaughters

The idea of humanity taking a next big evolutionary step is a fairly common element in sci-fi. What did you think of the collective-gestalt idea?

Even though it was hard to grasp, I did appreciate the collective gestalt idea and it was something I didn't expect in a sci-fi book. I usually enjoy books that say something about one's way of thinking and their behavior, Agree with Amy - I think Sturgeon presented the evolution of humanity in a style that is very much outside of the box - did not expect this in reading sci-fi. I liked the idea that even though each character individually had some strange incompetence, when they all came together, they complemented each other and sought to protect the entire homo-gestalt. In contrast, if the group was missing the strongest trait of one of the characters or killed off one another, it would be a kind of self-harm to the homo-gestalt.


The book included minority characters at a time when that was still probably a controversial notion. Does it still seem to be a progressive element of the book?

I understood this as a question of his use of language or terms... such as the use of "idiot", mongoloid, and negroes, which are not politically correct. I can see how at the time Sturgeon used characters with traits that were once considered 'inferior' (especially in the 50's ) to set the basis for the evolution of gestalt... It still is unfit by today's standards to degrade anyone for their abilities or race, but after the initial shock of seeing the terms being used, I still think if you can overlook the descriptions, he is still able to convey his ideas about how each character came together with what at the time was perceived as inferior to evolve into one thriving being..

Do the dissonant voices of sections one two and three contribute to the author's concept of a gestalt for you the reader?

I thought the voices were too disjointed to the point that I could not grasp the fact that each character was there to complement each other and be a part of the overall homo-gestalt. The three parts also seemed to have to far of a time span (which was not acknowledged in any part of the story), and I think the dissonant voices became more of an overall distraction. If each character was given more depth or a memorable personality that I could connect to, I could come to my own conclusion about the concept of 'gestalt' (which would have been more meaningful for me as a reader), than having to piece together the concept which is explicitly laid out in the last 40 pages.

Spoilage - Duane Michals - Love

2 more weeks...

I miss freely updating this with all the ramblings and nonsense of the last book I've read.... still I've been collecting, awaiting the day when I can read all the books I want. Recently a dear friend/ bookstor-ee spoiled an early xmas present...

A 1926...



What Burroughs says in the introduction to the edition I have...
I first read You Can’t Win in 1926, in an edition bound in red cardboard. Stultified and confined by middle class St. Louis mores, I was fascinated by this glimpse into an underworld of seedy rooming-houses, pool parlors, cat houses and opium dens, of bull pens and cat burglars and hobo jungles. I learned about the Johnson Family of good bums and thieves, with a code of conduct that made more sense to me than the arbitrary, hypocritical rules that were taken for granted as being “right” by my peers.

An erotic accident

I can hardly update this thing cause I'm busy updating and trying to fulfill my 379 book requirement for this semester... no not really. but 85 books for a YA class and 30 books for another, which puts me at a mid semester tally of 34 books for my databases and 10+ others for miscellaneous review assignments. Sh*t not even close. So on one of my book shopping binges for my classes I picked up this one, in addition to Weetzie Bat.. and it fulfills neither course.



It's fantasy erotica seemingly out of Penthouse letters? but still pretty fly. I'm a 27 year old grown ass woman. I can read this and be free to admit that it was pretty good! (except its neither YA (what the author is known as) or SF (what my work categorized it as). Porn baby in a cute little purple book.

If I looked in the mirror someday and saw no dark circles under my eyes, I would probably look better. I just wouldn't look like me. - Sarah Vowell

So I'm a week into school... I've been able to read things by choice, in a way, but its always with the underlining purpose that I have to write some review or compare and contrast or recommend similar titles, the write some sort of paper or make a database or blog in this case... yea library school. I've read some awesome YA books.. Ender's Game, Mockingjay!, The Real Life Diary of a Part-Time Indian, and now MAUS.. which have all been f***** amazing! I'm officially hooked. I guess my mood will change when I have to read romances for my other class.

Well fortunately I finished my YA book for the day, and found this at the library for the train ride home.

It's a the one and only commencement speech that he gave, and it was widely talked about after his suicide. Yea I know Infinite Jest is carried around like an accessory by cool kids and self conscious intellects, but this is amazing... you can afford to read this meager 137 page book with anywhere from 3 - 50 words per page. Amazing!

Last 'adult' leisure read..

School starts in one week... :(


The plot was laid out for me right on the jacket, and I knew exactly what was going to happen, and still - geddamn this book is so good! Even though it was written in 1899, it's still reeks of greed, detrimental relationships, abuse, murders, insanity, steam beer and whiskey... all in San Francisco!.

McTeague meets the only heartthrob in his life through pulling her teeth. When then get married, Trina wins $5,000 in the lottery, but becomes more and more stingy (a miser) in the process..to the point that she has to lie and compromise their living situation just to save the money for a rainy day. Without a degree, McTeague can no longer practice dentistry..then he gets tired of the job hunts and all of Trina's penny pinching, so he steals her money and flees the first time with just the money she saved, then returns to murder her and flees to the desert with the $5,000. .... then as tragic and beautiful, lays to his fate in death valley handcuffed to the dead soul that found him. Well it's written more humorously than that.

yeeee

Yea so I read the damn thing.. I mean I liked it enough to finish. I really didn't give a shit about the millions of kroner laundering or how corrupt the big businesses were. Pretty typical. The investigative reporting was modern, smart and engrossing. The methods of sexual assault and murder of the women and animals according to literal translations of bible verses were damn shocking and graphic. Salander (the girl with the dragon tattoo) was ambiguously attractive, rebellious, and intelligent... she's an advocate against the abuse of women. Her part was the epitome of exercising revenge.

Dude... how typical is the ending... I'm going to spoil this shit...
yea of course the girl who fucking disappeared and is presumed dead, is still alive and has some prime time reunion with the rich fuck who was trying to find her. Of course the girl with the dragon tattoo who doesn't trust a male soul and is all for women empowerment, falls in love with Blomkvist (the journalist) and the same guy who is the lustful, nice guy with a couple other female companions.

Happy bestseller schmeller book day... I was suckered again.

Hi I'm tired.

If you haven't read him already then poo on you.

Of course Bandini is just getting by and on the brink of becoming famous as a writer, without selling out to Hollywood by writing gaudy screen plays. Still broke, his love here is an elderly widowed woman who makes him food and sleeps by his side in her bed. Then there's the Filipinos, etc. Same ol' good stuff.

Panda for Amanda

Panda for Amanda, originally uploaded by ter -ri -fic!.

"It was the voice of a woman who is glad to be alive, who indulges herself, who is careless and indigent, and who will do any-thing to preserve the modicum of freedom which she possesses." - Henry Miller Quiet Days in Clichy

"...if you want to know how to enjoy life, you also have to know what sadness is. Otherwise it isn't worth a damn."

Thanks Celine for scattering my brain, thank Keret for balancing it with your 1 - 4 pages short stories about every persona imaginable with a touch of cynicism, erotica, morbidity, and humor. This author, who is apparently a household name in Tel Aviv, is genius. Well loosely. But really how many people can establish a plot, characters, with some depth, surprise, and relativity in less than 5 pages? well less than 5 short, spacey pages. He made me laugh about decapitated rabbits and children left to fend for themselves on top of refrigerators. You can find/read most of it on Google books. Thanks library.

Why was this thing such a killer to trudge through. I think the afterword by William Vollman reminded me why it's tolerable and why I am not insane for losing my place and train of thought within a thumb full of pages.. yea the transitions between places and events are lose or merely nonexistent. I still found myself reaching for this... even though after hours of pessimism, I still found it awesomely funny and entertaining. I was told to read the book before I read anything about Celine. The same friend who recommended it also later said "I hope it didn't piss you off." Apparently he was insane and the further you read into it, the more his thoughts are broken and jagged. I loved that he hated the world, the bourgeoisie, and he would not buy into civilized bullshit. Even though his take on existence is daunting, he is insightful and I still feel there is truth in his rantings. He is still a great writer and his wanderings from the first World War to Africa to New York to Detroit without any sense of a calling is refreshing. Okay it did help me get through the 5.5 hour flight with a new born crying baby and an angry, bitter couple from Manhattan.

"Maybe what makes life so terribly fatiguing is nothing other than the enormous effort. We make for twenty years, forty years, and more to be reasonable, to avoid being simply, profoundly ourselves that is, vile, ghastly, absurd. It's the nightmare of having to represent the halt subhuman we were fobbed off with as a small-size universal ideal, a superman from morning to night."

Sleep No Sleep Sleep

"... Even memories have their youth... when you let them grow old, they turn into revolting phantoms dripping with selfishness, vanity, and lies..." - Celine


ph: by Andoo

I am back after a week stint of big city. I like getting away from home, okay who doesn't. This was my fourth time checking out the city and its been a different experience every time. Okay, this time around made me realize how old I'm becoming... it was more of a mellow stride through BK and Manhattan, but I know I still have some growing up to do...




Sunday 07-11-10
"Time flies past from days to years. Tendencies don't seem to change much in people, enough where enemies can be friends again - vice versa. You also see how people grow or don't - evolve for the better or stay the same in irksome ways. Bonding - banter over stiff drinks that take years for beings to accustom their palates and where the history is there; the nostalgia that surmounts the bitterness is stronger with both time and drunken similarities. 'You two are a dangerous combination. Always trying to out drink each other.' - T.A."

"San Jose is such a sinkhole."



Plus "I forgot how subways - the feel, sound, faces - relax me... When I'm about to leave, I finally know my way around."




Back in Oakland with my one love...

NY bound carry on: 7 days 7 nights

NY bound carry on: 7 days 7 nights, originally uploaded by ter -ri -fic!.

So I'm leaving tomorrow for my first real vacation in years. Yea, like I'll be in a plane 1,000+ miles away!

Okay... what I really think about is how much time I get to dive deep and read. So after much contemplation... Journey to the end of the Night by Celine and The Third Eye by Rampa are the chosen. I guess Girl with the Dragon Tattoo and Game of Thrones will have to wait....

"When you have no imagination, dying is small beer; when you do have imagination, dying is too much."

"It's as black as an asshole."

I'm telling you this book is already amazing.

_______________________

"Yes I read. I have that absurd habit. I like beautiful poems, and all the beyond of that poetry. I am extraordinarily sensitive to those poor, marvelous worlds left in the dark night by a few men I never knew." - from a surrealist book, read by Nate in a blurred drunken state.

"My mind'sa dark and cloudy, my mind'sa gone to my feet." - Blind Willie McTell

Talk about beastiality! So a guy with a sociology degree and nothing to do becomes interested with a hobo that is parked in his neighborhood and lives inside an old yellow chevy. After some pestering, he's finally able to warm up to the guy and they drink a ton of alcohol then become friends. Then he slits his throat. Yea that all happened in the first 15 or so pages. That was the best part... well okay its still gets better. Still intrigued with the hobo, he gets into the car only to find four snakes slithering around. After some warming up the snakes become his compadres and lovers. They start terrorizing towns killing crowds of people at random. About 100 pages later... while I'm sitting at my volunteering gig at the library trying to finish up this book... it starts to get erotically uncomfortable when the snakes with their handler do 'magic powder', have orgies one by one with him, then all together slithering up and down and around his phallus until his 'semen drips', but its not just him, the snakes want more too. They also eat up the bits of his first lover snake cooked in marijuana.

What the fvck. Yea the talking snakes and the murders was surprising and comical.. but shit. ... ... 3 snakes and a man sex... then cannibalism.. awkward! Yea the title is literal.

Here we aren't, so quickly

After trudging through the last book, I appreciate how these quick, perverse, drug induced stories entertained. So in quite a few the main guy liked to "knuckle" twat including one of a thick stripper, as well as his comatose sister that he soon after pulls the plug on. In others, the protagonist is drugged up and makes a visit with a suburban mother that is convinced he has it all together with his degree and fronted job helping children. Then there's the kid that observes from a far his fat friend get constantly bullied and tortured bloody by nail clippers and sewing scissors from other kids in summer camp, then they all witness his downing of a big plastic jug and jump to his death from a canoe into the river. Simply twisted, dark, refreshing and smart.



Something that is also worth picking up is this weeks issue of the New Yorker that features 20 writers under 40... about 8 of them have stories in this issue, one being Jonathan Safran Foer's story, Here We Aren't So Quickly. It's something I didn't expect from him..really in his other books he just sounds like a stinkin' nice guy, but I like how this story showed his edge. Too bad I tore the thing out to give to my coworker and it got folded up and lost forever in a drunkin' state of getting kicked out of the Mumlers show at Blank Club for being too intoxicated... I guess that's something else. But.. I think this resonated with me due to my sudden interest in detrimental relationships, which sound like they can be perfect (trips, marriage, stable job, children), then they end in an entrapment of loneliness. Yea this is just that.. so f'in great.

I feel like I'm wasting my summer away. Working more, but not having enough money to buy toothpaste and contact fluid. I wanted to read more, but only managed to finish this mediocre 500 page booger of a book. My torso is swollen from all the meat and liquor that I've been consuming over the past 3 weeks. I have about 2 more months of summer and I absolutely cannot let it wither away into a tiny blip of a stupid blog post or page in my notebook. fuck!



It takes place in Barcelona during the Spanish Civil war. Daniel, the son of a bookseller is introduced to this sanctuary of "Forgotten Books", and stumbles upon "The Shadow of the Wind" by an author Julian Carax. He's very keen of the book and wants to find more writings by the author, but finds that there are none because they have been bought up and burned mysteriously by a character that obviously does not want them to exist. The more he digs into the situation, the more he finds that not only is someone purposely trying to rid his only copy, but those that are involved in someway or another with the author and his books are being killed off as well.
I do believe that a writer should be able to get to the point in 200 pages or less. This also lives up to the rep that 'bestsellers' carry... frivolous banter; contrived twists and turns; enough characters that causes one to lose track and ask, why does this matter? Yes, this was one of those books. The beginning and ending was fantastic...but midway it just had to have the blips of pubescent eroticism, betrayal, murders, and lies that are read much as prime time entertainment, rather than being literary stimulating. Okay I did really like that "The Shadow of the Wind" was really a book about the devil, and the imagery of Daniel (?) walking into the abandoned room filled to the brim of crucifixes.

Last time I listen to a customer in Campbell.

Pretty uneventful, but interesting to say the least. He's an aspiring literary critic (and later becomes reputable for it) that moves amongst Chilean's elite poets and authors through Farewell (the best lit critic out there), and even crosses paths with greats like Neruda and attends his funeral. He is also a priest, but just because of the events that played out as a child (not wholeheartedly). This wasn't a one night event as I previously thought, but a stream of thoughts, ideas, and mild ramblings that are exchanged amongst him and Chile's high society. I found myself puzzled.. wasn't I just reading about him wandering through the streets at night and now he's giving three different lessons to these officianados on Marx and Engels? It was still interesting enough to follow through with it and the rants about literature and Chile and all the abouts that keep the culture prosperous despite tough times, but I do miss the mild suspense I get from reading his novels.

Summer Vacation

I've been jumping to and from different things... mostly without any intentions of finishing. I feel like I'm searching for some kind of justification to turn away from the ways I have been raised... like do I really need all these material things and this job to feel secure? satisfied? Honestly, I am broke as hell, but I am having the time of my life. Okay... well the whiskey helps.

Aside from picking at different things... Walden, Will of Doubt, The Wisdom of Insecurity, etc. for the reasons I mentioned above... I finally got around to reading her short stories, which I felt were perfect and really fucking enjoyable.



I love her cynicism about women and how the can really act or fall into this overemotional, dependent, ditsy, jealous role just because of their men. Yes, thank god there was someone in the '50's that spoke up and revealed the ugly truth about marriage and pitiful relationships. AND its hilarious! well smart, witty, creative, and pokes fun at the lifestyle of high class New York. Pretty stinkin good.

"I have no money, no wife, no auto. I have no dog. I have neither a radio set or a rubber plant - I have no troubles".



No, it's not the chubby dude from Shallow Hal. An autobiography and bestseller from the '20s by an outlaw with a conscious. After a lifetime of burglaries, socializing with deviants, and stealing to get by - then years served with some escapes from prisons throughout North America, and a decade long 'hop' addiction, this guy has been through it all. It sounds grim, but its the complete opposite, it's more of a story of trying to live outside of the confines of society, but then getting caught and beaten down by the failing legal system - which back then consisted of torture by lashes, straight jackets, and the like. Black, even though labeled a convict, is intelligent, and lives by keen rational and integrity - yea, he even made sure there were no kids in the houses he stole from. After years of stealing and being acquitted by a judge that finally saw the potential in him, he kicked his habit and worked as a librarian for a paper in San Francisco. I'm fascinated with his sincerity and loyalty that he always kept and expressed to those that he felt showed him good throughout his lifetime. He also read the encyclopedia 3x through, plus every book he could get his hands on (with the exception of the bible - ha!) It came to the point that I began to root for him through his bag snatching and jewel heists, so that he could get a decent room and something to eat. He really does break down the discrepancies of the legal system - the pointless brutality of convicts where he advocates for progress. It's all local too.

happy mother's day mom

You created a monster. I mean a nice, presentable young woman.

a misaligned universe

my planets are out of orbit.. something is throwing my days completely off.

I received my first failing grade on an assignment. F as in F*****tard.
I missed a shift that I was supposed to cover for someone yesterday.
I am supposed to be at a bridal shower, but I got lost on my bike in Walnut Creek. Literally the two different directions each had a non- discoverable street.
BUT there are some play things - free mumlers show, free yeasayer show, and luda on repeat keeps me feeling ok. I hate when there are a couple days, where everything is leaving me saying WHAT THE F^%*!!!! and causes me to drink massive amounts of tequilla and forget, then question my purpose in life. Should I really be in library school?




So... I have no idea why I read through this thing. It started off so promising, and ended up more as a history/anthro lesson... and sorry to spoil, but the lost city of Z is still a theory. The writer, who went to search for this city, found what anyone else would expect to find in the Amazon - heat, tribesmen, and trees. Okay it wasn't that bad. I really did like the stories of the disappearing explorers, cannibals, flesh consuming diseases, and the thrill every one of the explorers had of discovering the unknown. P.H. Fawcett is the main guy here, not the writer at all (even though it starts off as his planned exploration)... I am seriously shaking my head. Here is Fawcett looking like a San Franciscan.

I'm sitting on the fence with this one. I think it's so short, and the shortest of all Pynchon novels that I can read it again. I don't know how much I like stories that don't tell you what the protagonist is after right away. I mean I understand, that you have to see how it is for her to be on the search for something she isn't sure about either, but it also doesn't help that Pynchon writes so descriptively that he's telling you what was on the TV in the same room the conversation is going. If what is on TV is significant to the story? I probably just missed it. I did like how post-modern it was, all the secret society snooping, and that the setting is in the Bay Area (up Telegraph, over the Bay Bridge, off of Howard, etc.) I don't get stories with coded meanings...

okay I'll get back to my homework now....

google quote of the day

Read, every day, something no one else is reading. Think, every day, something no one else is thinking. Do, every day, something no one else would be silly enough to do. It is bad for the mind to continually be part of unanimity.

-Christopher Morley's last words (whoever the hell you are).

I've been so distracted and all over the place lately. I think I realize that I have a big problem growing up.

So I don't know how I feel about this guy yet. Am I really going to try to explain what this thing is about? A mildly fantasy/ dream scape novel that switches back and forth between the main characters' parallel universes. The first half is that he's a part of some research/ experiment of the mind gone wrong. The second half sounds more like a dream of his where he is separated from his shadow and ponders being one with it again. It's confusing because you can't determine which is reality versus which is just a world in his conscious. I did like the pop culture references...["Bob Dylan sounds like a child singing to the rain"], the search to learn about unicorns, and lastly how the main character spends the last of his days. There is always something interesting about someone who knows that their world is going to end soon, and does what he wants to make it worthwhile. I also think that Murakami is a bit of a chauvinist, cause of all his random sex spiels with his character's librarian lover and spurts of having to talk about the character's being so well read (I read Balzac and Turgenev..'you don't read anything modern?' I've read Razor's Edge 3 times) uh yea. More or less a good read, and I just might be on of those who read everything by this guy. Okay probably not. The getting slit in the stomach was a bit much for me to handle.

The Politics of Happiness

lovely, originally uploaded by ter -ri -fic!.

One common measure of how clean a mountain stream is to look for trout. If you find the trout, the habitat is healthy. It's the same way with children in the city. Children are a kind of indicator. If we can build a successful city for children, we will have a successful city for all people.

All this pedestrian infrastructure shows respect for human dignity. We're telling people, "You are important -- not because you're rich or because you have a Ph.D., but because you are human." If people are treated as special, as sacred even, they behave that way. This creates a different kind of society.

-Penalosa's thoughts via Bicycle Diaries

So I'm cheating and I'm blogging about this right before I finish the last 30 pages. I actually didn't expect that much and that is when things tend to turn out better. (I guess that's the way I see things in general anyway.) So the whole biking thing is pretty minimal compared to David Byrne's opinionated rants with everything that he comes across in his travels. He has a fold up bike that he packs with him almost everywhere and does include a tips and what to wear guide at the end. What really pulled me towards this book is that he writes about the places that I have been i.e. London, Berlin, Buenos Aires, Manila, San Francisco-duh, and New York. Even though his biking insights were nominal, I really began to appreciate his perspective about things... his anti corporate, advocacy, music and art spiel (does insanity really make a good artist).. he's more down to earth and had some legitimate insight. He also really knew his history about Manila and the Marcos' and martial law.

"Language is primarily a useful tool born out of a need for control... What may have begun as an instrument of social and economic control has now been internalized by us as a mark of being civilized..." One of his ideas about why tribes in the Philippine had to begin to adopt a formal language.

It's good for a bit of personal philosophy (that at least I can say I agree with some of his pov) rather than a book about travels, biking, and music reference... It really is his stinking diary written for the masses. one thumb up.

Pavel: Are you going to blog about this?

Okay yea I'll blog about it. My thighs and calves are girthier and the ride was beautiful, until we got to Palo Alto. People are always nice and you can tell when you've reached city lines when the road is cracked and rocky. The cities in the "ghetto", 3rd st and East Palo Alto always have to the most character and look like they have the best places to eat. Santa Clara and anything around San Thomas, Central expressway are horrid and make you travel the most indirect way.

The hardest part was overcoming boredom on expressways, then tired arms, numb toes from the cold, and burning eyes and thighs. I am still soooooo thrilled about it, and it was the best way to spend my last Saturday of Spring break. Oh yea... all with a psi of 80. ouch.


P.S. - I love boathouses.

wierdo 1am

wierdo 1am, originally uploaded by ter -ri -fic!.

the average American will eat 21,000 entire animals in his lifetime

Yeesh. I believe when I first decided to cut meat from my diet I was 19 going on 20. I thought of it to be unethical, cruel, contradicting, and it made me lose a good 10 lbs over the course. I ate seafood, then gradually cut out the fish, then milk, and eggs. I did this for about 4 more years (even in the PI)... and then I sometimes ate chicken wings <3, then I ate all seafood, then I had steak in Argentina..so on and so forth. I am still a conflicted person, but I did read this over dinner of a hot link, and after buying from the store hummus, soy bacon, drumsticks and a pack of salami. I do like wings and love sushi, but it's true that being free of meat gives you a clear mind. All of a sudden you're no longer conflicted with your ideals.. but the trade off is you get all the annoying 'why don't you eat meat' fuss dealing with everyone and anyone else in every meal you don't eat by yourself.

We have been disconnected with how our food is made, and have a disregard for animals because of the way we perceive their role in our social and cultural existence. A lot of what Foer describes in here is similar to Schlosser, Cook, and Pollan in their pov of the food industry. It's even the same sentiments that Sinclair expressed in Jungle, which is that factory farming is as unethical as life gets and what is in the meat we eat is really making us sick. Foer dug deep in his research, and he mostly proves points on how animals, even fish are intelligent and have the receptors for pain and emotion. Not too much of a influencing point (animals communicate and have feelings too?), but it is true that most of us can't eat a porkchop, after seeing a pig get his snout cut off and skinned while conscious. Or even how our Thanksgiving meals are nothing like what the Pilgrims had...and chickens get dipped in 11% chemicals (apparently it says on the label) and the water used to clean contaminated birds (feces soup). Are we really that ignorant? I know I am...

..how about if not eating meat is not such a big deal. and the USDA sucks.

I'll try it again...

I really enjoy Bolano. .. okay. Well I have ditched a couple...
So it's a half half deal. Really. The plot was interesting, a doctor (Monsieur Pain), who goes to treat this woman's husband who's dying of hiccups, but two spies are on his tail and bribe him leave the husband be... then some weird shit happens and then he's in a movie theater, then things don't make much sense... I'm kind of tired of trying to find some deeper/ hidden meaning amongst all this. Everyone was raving about this book... but I say mehhh. I'll do a reread and get back to you...